An Insight

I have to tell the story of my aunt. It is a RIOT!!!!

Imagine a large Kathy Bates, roll her in a sandbox, strip away any makeup, add a few fruit flies circling her head, and BAM! you have a Gail.

My moms 50th b-day was in Feb. we had a b-day dinner at a great Mexican restruant in Vegas. I LOVE the place. So, my cousin has a 18 month old baby and he had fallen asleep at dinner. Gail, in her ever so desperate need to look like a helpful person, decided to hold the baby in her arms while she ate. Keep in mind that she is the only person that I have ever seen that can actually dirty a black shirt.

So, with baby in arm, she proceeds to eat her stuffed pepper thingy, and red sauce began to drip from her fork and on to the baby's forehead...well its really a five head, but you get the idea. Without missing a beat, she would put the fork on the plate, and wipe the sauce off the baby with her fingers and lick them clean. All this while she appeared to be deep in conversation with my Grandpa. As I watched, totally entranced, my mother kicked me under the table, and tipped her head towards my aunts direction. It was clear by the look on my face that I was well aware of the situation unfolding at the table.

I could no longer contain myself. I broke down in near convulsions of laughter. As is typical of Gail, she naturally flet the need to know why my mother and I were laughing so hard. So, I told her. "Gail, for once your not dropping food on yourself, your dropping it on your grandson." With no change of her face, she uncrinkled her filthy napkin, and placed it over the kids head, and kept right on eating...well eating half, and still dripping the other in his head.

I know its hard to visualize this, but close your eyes and try. Its well worth the effort.

and now for your viewing pleasure.....